Tipping tips: A cheat sheet to leaving gratuities

Zachary Hansen

Special for All The Moms

In the United States, tipping is a fact of life, both customary and expected.

It's also nuanced and confusing. 

How much money do you leave? And in what situations?

We turned to The Emily Post Institute for general guidelines to help you make sure you aren't under-tipping certain workers while over-tipping others.

To avoid having your waiter spit in your soup or your hair dresser wanting to cut something other than your hair, consider this tipping advice.

Sit-down restaurants and buffets

Tip somewhere between 15 to 20 percent for sit-down meal. Buffets can be less — about 10 percent.

What about that kind soul who brings the pizza to your door or the Uber driver? Yes. You should tip for the luxury of home delivery food. Aim for somewhere in-between buffets or sit-downs...about 12 percent.

To-go orders

Unlike pizza delivery, you're the driver here. So unless you really think the person who hands you your take-out needs the extra money, there's no obligation to tip.

Baristas and bartenders

For those that make a daily, morning coffee run, throw in an extra buck for your barista or about 10 to 15 percent. The same applies to the bartender crafting your drinks and keeping you company.

Taxi and valet drivers

Make sure you tip your taxi driver just as you would a waiter or waitress — about 15 to 20 percent. This applies to Uber and Lyft drivers as well. You should give about $2 to $5 to a valet driver too.

Hotel housekeeping staff

The best practice is to leave about $5 to $10 per night for the housekeeping staff. A CreditCards.com survey shows only 27 percent always leave money for housekeeping staff, but make sure you treat them fairly.

Barbers and hair stylists

According to the same CreditCards.com survey, about 67 percent tip their barber or hair stylist. Considering they're holding sharp scissors and blades near your face and hair, 15 to 20 percent is customary.

Skycap at the airport

Make sure to give the person who carries your bags at the airport, also known as a skycap, about $2 for the first bag and $1 for each additional bag.

Bellhop at the hotel

Just like skycaps, pay a bellhop $2 for the first bag and $1 per each additional bag. Also, throw in an extra $2 or $3 for additional services, such as room delivery.

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Helen Ford Wallace, Lillie-Beth Brinkman and Callie Athey

QUESTION: I enjoy your columns and had a follow-up question to the tipping etiquette rules column. What is the rule on “buffet tipping?” My wife loves buffets (I don't), and since all the server does is bring you drinks and refills, how much should they be tipped?

One full-service restaurant we frequent prints the suggested tip on the bottom of the check, but rather than being 15, 18, 20 percent, they have 18, 18, and 20 percent. I assume it is not a typo because it has been on the check for several years. We tip according to “what we can afford” and not “what is expected.” 15 percent is our comfort zone. (From a reader who is 71 and retired.)

CALLIE'S ANSWER: That is odd to have 18 percent printed twice on the receipt. I think tipping 15 percent in your comfort zone is perfectly fine and a good tip.

LILLIE-BETH'S ANSWER: This question gets asked a lot and discussed often in various places, and I wonder often if I'm tipping too much or not enough at buffet places. I also question what to leave for tips at sit-down restaurants for which I call in a to-go order and pick it up. The servers at buffet places do more than you think they do, but not as much as a single waiter assigned to your table who takes your order and brings your food. And I'm not sure whether the people who bus your table and replenish the food on buffets get paid like waiters (less than minimum wage from the restaurant with estimated tips calculated as part of their salary) or a regular wage.

The Emily Post Institute, at emilypost.com, has a helpful tipping guide that suggests leaving 10 percent of the total bill for buffet-style restaurants. That seems to be a good starting point, but there is no harm in tipping more.

HELEN'S ANSWER: Tipping is a question that keeps coming up, and it still depends on the level of service provided.

When you go through a line to get your food, either buffet or cafeteria, someone has to either serve you, keep your table clean or bring out the food to keep the buffet line stocked and clean. Sometimes those people are not evident to the public. If a lone server is only pouring water in your glass, I don't think that is the person who gets a tip. When you pay — and if you add a percentage to the bill — you might inquire as to who gets the tip?

Some people tip 5 percent of the total bill for a buffet and leave it on the table. Others might tip $1 per person. Some people never tip at a buffet as they feel like they have waited on themselves by getting water and/or the food. Whatever you decide to do, be sure the tip goes to the person you think has helped you the most. Readers, what are your thoughts?

GUEST'S ANSWER: Mary McReynolds, novelist: We tip at 15 percent, buffet and otherwise, and gladly pay more when service is exceptional.

Sometimes you are lucky enough to have a truly outstanding server with a great personality who anticipates and attends your every need. It is a total joy to give that person a bonus for exemplary response and attitude.

To ask an etiquette question, email helen.wallace@cox.net. For more 20-40-60 etiquette, go to blog.newsok.com/partiesextra.